Fcancerwith: (A Holiday To Cure...) Post Chemo-Crash

Post/Mid-Chemo Isn’t What I Expected

In the space of a few weeks, I’ve gone from elated—chemo’s over—to weirdly overwhelmed. Not physically. Physically I feel loads better. But mentally? I’ve crashed a bit.

Not in a dramatic, can't-get-out-of-bed way. More like… too many tabs open. I thought finishing chemo would bring clarity. Instead, I’m foggy, distracted, and struggling to focus.

During Chemo, Life Was Simpler (Sort Of)

On chemo, the goal was singular: feel OK. That was the full-time job. On the good days, I’d either get some work done or see someone—rarely both.

Low energy made low expectations feel achievable. Work helped fill the space. Structure came easy because the rest of life shrank down.

Now? Everything’s Wide Open

Post-chemo, life feels bigger. And while that’s technically good, it’s also overwhelming. I’m now juggling:

• More social stuff – friends, family, plans

• More work – but less of the urgent kind

• More health projects – I’m starting mistletoe therapy, talking to a new pharmacist about supplements, and kicking off work with Astron Health

• More logistics – from budgets to future treatment planning

• More fun to plan – holidays before a likely chemo restart in October

It’s too much. And ironically, the more I have to manage, the less I’ve managed to stay focused on FC:AI—even though it’s something I deeply care about.

FC:AI’s Been Quieter… But Not Abandoned

I haven’t disappeared. I haven’t stopped. I’ve just been in a sort of post-chemo limbo—still doing stuff, but not always the stuff I’d planned.

I’ve paused symptom tracking. I’ve shifted to tracking nutrition and therapies instead, but that’s its own chaotic process. The tools I built need adapting—and that’s coming, just not yet.

What’s Next?

I will be posting a breakdown of the FC:AI tracker I used during chemo. That’s coming this week. It was one of the most useful things I built, and it deserves a proper moment.

But beyond that... TBD.

What I Need Right Now…

A f*cking holiday.

We’re heading away from mid-August through to the end of September, and honestly, I think it’s exactly what I need. Not a break from FC:AI. A reset for it. A bit of space, sun, and time to reconfigure before chemo likely kicks back in later this year.

Bring it on.